A year ago, I wrote about why it is important for children in institutions to be allowed to celebrate their birthday (HERE). That it impacts their sense of self-worth and of identity if this is not allowed. Today, on another birthday of mine, I want to look at children who do not even have a birthday. They may not be aware of the date of their birth, or no one may be aware of it, because their birth was never registered.
Continue reading “Knowing Your Birthday”Category: Awareness
Establishing Security for the Child
A couple of weeks ago, I wrote a blog about Sylvia Duncan’s presentation at the Trauma Informed Practice Conference in Birmingham in September, which you can find HERE. I mentioned how she pointed out the importance of not making false promises, in order to gain a child’s trust. I have realised that there is something else she mentioned that is important to share.
She spoke about how children who have not been able to form attachments when they were very young, and those whose trust has been broken to the point where they have lost any willingness to form new attachments, may be 7 or 8 years old, but in a lot of ways, emotionally, they function like babies. Because they have not had the opportunity to go through those early development stages yet, or they have regressed to before the stage where they went through that development.
Continue reading “Establishing Security for the Child”Understanding ACEs
Recently, I had the opportunity to watch the documentary ‘Resilience: the biology of stress and the science of hope.’, made in 2016. It was a very powerful experience. And it had a message that needs to be spread, so I will share some of it in this blog.
Continue reading “Understanding ACEs”Roleplaying to Overcome Trauma
At the Trauma Informed Practice Conference in Birmingham in September, Nandor Grosch presented the work he does through film-making with institutionalised children, in Hungary. A project where he allows the children to determine the story that is going to be acted out and helps them act it out and film it. Over 400 films have been made by the children to date, over the years.
Continue reading “Roleplaying to Overcome Trauma”Be Aware of Your Language
When Sylvia Duncan presented her story of a partnership that had an 83% success rate with helping children who were considered ‘impossible to place’, after a series of placement breakdowns, develop to a point where they were able to put into a longterm family placement, she brought up an important point. She mentioned that they made a point of not promising the children that they would be able to stay with a family longterm after the programme or that they would get a ‘forever family’ (as adoption families are often referred to). They only made them a promise that they knew was within their ability to keep: that there would be no more sudden placement changes without preparation.
Continue reading “Be Aware of Your Language”Behaviour as Communication
At the Trauma Informed Practice Conference, in Birmingham in September, Caryn Onions presented the achievements and approach of The Mulberry Bush, a therapeutic residential school for children who are severely traumatised, in Oxford. I was very impressed by what they are accomplishing at the Mulberry Bush, and I was particularly struck by their approach to the children’s challenging behaviour.
Continue reading “Behaviour as Communication”International Day for the Eradication of Poverty
Progress has been made on the road towards eradication of poverty, but there is a long way, still to go. Especially since in recent years income inequality in many countries has been growing again, after it shrunk for a period. It is strange, that in the face of so much evidence, there are still people who think: ‘I don’t care about all those poor people, as long as I can grow my wealth’. When it has been proven over and over again that when income inequality is reduced and poverty is aleviated, the entire economy benefits and everyone is better off.
Poverty is one of the main reasons why children end up in institutions, and may also be a reason for them eding up in other forms of alternative care. In previous blogs (HERE and HERE), I have written about how we can prevent children from ending up being separated from their family due to poverty, without having to accomplish complete eradication. In this blog, I would like to outline what eradication of poverty – or something close to it – could do for reducing the need for alternative care.
Continue reading “International Day for the Eradication of Poverty”To Know Your Life Story
Children who grow up in a family, from the time they were small babies, know the story about their life. They love asking their parents to tell them about the time that… they were born, their siblings arrived, they hit certain milestones, the family moved house or had big celebrations, and so on. By talking about these things, sharing memories and stories, by watching photos and videos these children build up their life story. And their life story includes a narrative from the time of which they have no memories.
Our life story is important for our sense of identity. It plays a role in our image of who we are. Unfortunately, for children in alternative care it is very rare to know about their entire life and to have a complete life story to hold on to.
Continue reading “To Know Your Life Story”International Day of the Girl Child
On the International Day of the Girl Child, we need to both celebrate the contributions and the potential of girls around the world. And at the same time be aware that still in many places they are more vulnerable. Because their contributions are disregarded, they are not given an opportunity to reach their potential, and all their strength is required for just staying alive.
Continue reading “International Day of the Girl Child”Keeping Best Interest at the Centre
The Convention on the Rights of the Child states in several articles that the Best Interest of the child should always be kept at the centre of all decision making and should take precedence over all other considerations. This is a very important principle. One that is generally acknowledged to be correct. In fact, in many countries, the law states the same thing. However in practice, the best interest of the child very often falls by the roadside.
Continue reading “Keeping Best Interest at the Centre”